Jane Pol­lak spent most of her life ​“look­ing for a fam­i­ly.” Raised by a Jew­ish nar­cis­sis­tic moth­er who was emo­tion­al­ly unavail­able, she grew up believ­ing that love came from per­for­mance rather than from being seen, heard, and acknowl­edged for her true self. It fol­lowed that she mar­ried an extro­vert who per­formed for his stu­dents and yet was unable to con­nect with his wife. In this poignant, instruc­tive, mem­oir Pol­lak inves­ti­gates the roots of mis­guid­ed love based on val­ues her Bronx-born moth­er thought her chil­dren should have, and paints a pic­ture of what it means to live a sat­is­fied life. 

Her tale starts in the cou­ples’ coun­sel­ing office, where her soon-to-be ex-hus­band drops the bomb that he’s see­ing some­one else. From there, Jane goes on to find self-empow­er­ment through her La Leche League group, her career as an artist, her trav­els around the world, her jour­ney through twelve-step recov­ery, and her expe­ri­ences while dat­ing in her six­ties. At last, she forges a bliss­ful life on her own in Man­hat­tan, con­duct­ing busi­ness and enjoy­ing time with fam­i­ly, friends, and a bit of romance.