In our high­ly con­nect­ed age, chil­dren have less self-con­trol than ever. About half of the cur­rent gen­er­a­tion of chil­dren will devel­op a mood or behav­ioral dis­or­der or a sub­stance addic­tion by age eigh­teen. Our old dis­ci­pline tools – pun­ish­ments and rewards – no longer work to instill inde­pen­dence and respon­si­bil­i­ty in kids.

Jour­nal­ist and par­ent­ing expert Kather­ine Reynolds Lewis saw this cri­sis of self-reg­u­la­tion devel­op over 14 years of facil­i­tat­ing her syn­a­gogue’s sex­u­al­i­ty retreat for ninth graders. Her solu­tion: The Appren­tice­ship Mod­el, a new the­o­ry of dis­ci­pline that cen­ters on learn­ing the art of self-con­trol. Blend­ing new sci­en­tif­ic research and pow­er­ful indi­vid­ual sto­ries of change, Lewis shows that, if we trust our chil­dren to face con­se­quences, they will learn to adapt and mod­er­ate their own behav­ior. She watch­es as chaot­ic homes become peace­ful, bewil­dered teach­ers see progress, and her own fam­i­ly evolves. You’ll rec­og­nize your own fam­i­ly in Lewis’s sen­si­tive, real­is­tic sto­ries, and you’ll find a path to mak­ing every­one in your home more capa­ble, kinder, and hap­pi­er – includ­ing yourself.