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This piece is part of our Witnessing series, which shares pieces from Israeli authors and authors in Israel, as well as the experiences of Jewish writers around the globe in the aftermath of October 7th.
It is critical to understand history not just through the books that will be written later, but also through the first-hand testimonies and real-time accounting of events as they occur. At Jewish Book Council, we understand the value of these written testimonials and of sharing these individual experiences. It’s more important now than ever to give space to these voices and narratives.
In collaboration with the Jewish Book Council, JBI is recording writers’ first-hand accounts, as shared with and published by JBC, to increase the accessibility of these accounts for individuals who are blind, have low vision or are print disabled.
My teachers say,
we need to recognize evil.
We need to name it,
we need to call it out.
We need to know when
we are dealing with evil.
We need to be able
to tell others
what evil is.
But I flinch when they say this,
because I have trouble
with seeing evil.
I can see evil actions,
evil intentions,
evil words.
But when
I try to see evil
in people,
I
see
something
else.
Because I know
humans are almost always
both evil and good.
And everywhere in my life
how I see humans
matters.
If I see you as
only evil,
what can I do with you?
I cannot
teach you
connect with you
meet your needs
understand you
make peace with you
ever trust you or
learn from you.
Evil is meant only
to be destroyed.
Evil is there only
to distinguish the good.
But I don’t believe
G‑d
creates
humans
wholly evil.
(But did you, G‑d?
Are you testing me
to see if I can tell?)
Evil was done
to my people
on October 7.
Raping and murdering;
Holding hostages –
absolutely evil.
And evil has
been done since.
Shall I say
all those who perpetrated this
were evil?
Are their leaders evil?
Are their families evil?
Are their children evil?
Are their aid workers evil?
Is everyone calling for peace
in that land… evil?
The trouble with seeing evil is
soon you see it
everywhere. In everyone
who sees things differently.
Then understanding another view
is irrelevant;
It’s simply more evil.
And life becomes
black and white and scary.
I have learned: evil is a test.
This is how it tests me:
Can I retain my
empathy, kindness,
wisdom, hope,
courage
trust
peace
when confronted with evil?
Can I see evil
and keep my goodness?
Can I be affected by evil
and still care
about all my people and
also
people
who are not mine?
Can I experience evil
and still trust in good?
Studying mystical teachings
I learned:
evil is an illusion.
Here in the physical world, evil exists;
but ultimately
there is nothing but G‑d.
On October 8 as I danced
outside in a parking lot
(it was Simchat Torah)
they started to sing
“Ein Od Milvado”
and I cried.
My teachers:
There is nothing but G‑d.
Is G‑d is also over there
with the wretched
hungry
homeless
children?
If I harden my heart
to their suffering
because of evil
done to me
have I passed or failed
evil’s test?
My teachers say,
we have to name evil
when we see it
and I agree
we can’t let evil actions happen
without being named.
If we don’t,
horror becomes normal.
But I ask:
When does seeing too much evil
blind us from knowing
what is good?
The views and opinions expressed above are those of the author, based on their observations and experiences.
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